thinking - sadness - and emilee

So, this past friday was a sad day for me. It was June 17th. On that day my niece, Emilee, turned 6. She's 6 years old already. That's insane. I can't believe she's already 6!

This would be such a joyful entry - celebrating her 6th birthday - if circumstances were different.

I haven't seen Emilee since she was 3. Before I moved to Florida she was only 20 minutes away. But I haven't seen her in 2 1/2 years. She is my brother, Bradley's, little girl. And she looks just like me. At least she did the last time I saw her. Long blond hair - big blue eyes - skinny as a rail.

Saying that her mother and Bradley haven't gotten along since Emilee was born is an understatement. And all of that hate, anger, bitterness, and every other bad thing possible, has kept Emilee from so much love. I love that little girl so much. My parents love her. My entire family, extended family included, love her. My brother loves her. But the evil in this situation keeps Emilee from that love.

I pray for Kristen, Bradley's (someday soon!) wife. I pray that she never meets Emilee's mother. I pray that she is never put into that awful situation. I pray that she is spared from the pain that it would bring. She doesn't deserve that.

I cried so much after the last time I saw Emilee. It was only for a short time - and I couldn't even hug her and tell her how much I love her. Her mother kicked my mom and I out of their house. We just wanted to give her Christmas presents. It was awful. It still hurts me.

I miss that little girl. She's 6 now. She'll be 18 before I know it. Maybe then she'll come looking for the family that she hasn't known in years.

I miss her.