one month - one week - tied up in insecurity

Today it is one month and 8 days until I am finished with my college career. This is an exciting thought, and also a stressful thought. I have realized more and more how much my job search and my mind have been caught up in insecurity and fear. It's not that I'm afraid that I won't get a job. It's more that I would feel a lot better if I knew where I was going to be after I am finished in December.

I think that was the reason that God didn't want me to have the job in Alabama. I think that had I been offered the job, I would have most likely taken it, and then would have been very secure in the fact that I knew where I was going to be. Instead of this, I am now required to be even more dependent upon God and His will for me. And now I have to surrender it all, again, to Him. This isn't a bad thing, it's just a trust thing.

I just don't like the idea of not knowing. I'm a nosey person as it is...and now to top it all off, God is making me wait. Though, if I would just get it through my head that His timing is perfect timing, then all might be well. But then I wouldn't be human anymore either. God is trying to teach me patience (like He always is) and He's also teaching me to surrender.

Surrender - something that I have had to do a lot of. And yet I am still learning how to do it...and actually mean it. It's a heart issue. And I pray that God would continue to grow my heart and stretch my mind. To surrender everything to Him is where true joy is.

Prayer Requests:
* My Leanne - her back
* My cousin Mary - her stress
* My last month and week at Geneva and with my roomies...my wonderful, amazing, godly, roomies
* Wisdom - Knowledge - Will to Surrender
* Job

peace all,
~Jenna